We can’t give another what we do not have. How we feel and what we think about our self limits what we give to others in our lives and the people we love. I just celebrated my 39th birthday and the older I get, the more I recognize that how powerful I am in my relationships, my work and my ability to contribute to others is dependent upon how I feel about myself.
I used to think that taking care of myself was setting aside time for myself, going on vacation or getting pampered. While I truly enjoy time to myself, time away or a good massage, today taking care of myself is having a deep love for who I am. The more I love myself, the more tolerant I am of others, the less triggered I get and, most importantly, the less I rely on another for my self worth or value.
Some of my greatest pain has come from expecting something from another and it not being fulfilled. If I wait for another to fulfill my happiness or to make me feel loved, I am setting them and myself up for disappointment and perhaps even confrontation. While our relationships thoroughly enrich our lives, our relationship with self is first and foremost because all other relationships are dependent on the depth of connection you have to yourself.
Many of us know how we feel or what we think about another, but aren’t tapped into how we really feel about ourselves. Be curious how you speak to yourself and what you think about who you are. The beautiful thing about our thoughts is that we can change them. And when we change our thoughts, our emotions tend to follow.
To be up to big things in my life, to get through very difficult times, to live vividly and dynamically, to run a successful business and to love the way I know the people in my life deserved to be loved, I must first take care of my own needs and be connected to and love myself.
This is so important to commit to, especially during the holidays. Give yourself acknowledgement, love and appreciation, and then watch how you will have access to love deeper, appreciate another more and enjoy everything greater. The biggest gift you have to give to the world is who you are, so honor all of you and share your greatest, boldest, loving self with those around you. As Whitney Houston sang, “The greatest love of all is easy to achieve. Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all!”
Infinite blessings and love to you!
Courtesy of Bala Vinyasa Yoga.