Looking Ahead With Lauren: The Love/Hate Relationship We Have With Ourselves

writing-listsWe all have a list constantly running through our heads of things we dislike about ourselves. We may even think about the things we love, but probably not as often. First I’ll start with a list of things I would like to change about myself or grow to love. I don’t want to think about it as things I hate or dislike about myself because that starts self-bashing and I would prefer to use this list as a list to spur change. I also want to end with a list of things I love about myself so it is the last thing I think about. I hope you do these same lists to start a conversation with yourself on things you can change, things you need to accept and love instead of hate about yourself and focus on the things you love about yourself instead of constant negative chatter in your brain. These lists can include both physical, emotional and any characteristics about yourself you can think of.

Things I Would Change:

  • At times I am very shy, introverted and even awkward. I get very nervous in new social situations. While one thing I do like is that I can be very good at hiding this and being friendly to new people, I just wish I could be more outgoing with people I don’t know very well.
  • Honestly, I think my nose and my ears are too big for my face. I hate pictures of my side profile.
  • I wish I had more discipline at times when it comes to eating well. I have a big sweet tooth.
  • My hair is annoying. It isn’t quite curly or wavy but it isn’t really straight either. Sometimes its a fight to make it look decent.
  • I can be judgmental without realizing it.

Things I Love (Please excuse my self-promotion ;):

  • While I do have issues with my appearance (who doesn’t?), I do think that I am pretty, especially when I take the time to look nice. My self esteem used to be very low when I was younger (perhaps a topic for another day?) and honestly as I grew older, got contacts, did my hair and started getting some attention from boys it definitely helped my self-esteem. Who doesn’t feel amazing when someone tells them they are beautiful? :)
  • When I am around someone I feel very comfortable with (close friends, parents, etc.) I am very goofy, outgoing and I’m told I’m funny. I love being silly.
  • I care a lot about the people I love and try to put 110% into my friendships and relationships. I love buying gifts and doing nice things and I think I have real knack for it.
  • I love my eyes and my legs!
  • I am a good writer and I inspire people with my words. At least I hope I do!

Please today make your own lists. I could probably think of more for both categories, but I just wanted to give you an example. I think it can be very therapeutic to write a list of things you love about yourself or a list of great compliments you receive from people. It can be a great boost when you’re feeling down, your mind is only focused on your “negative” qualities or someone has hurt you recently. Even though it feels a little self-centered to write it down (at least it does to share it!), the beauty is you don’t have to share your list if you don’t want to! I hope you all realize that everyone has qualities they don’t like about themselves or makes mistakes, but your wonderful qualities and inner and outer beauty can shine brightly if you let them. You are beautiful, so tell yourself that every day!

To read more from Lauren, please visit Lauren’s Thoughts.

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  1. This is great. I love this and I shall makea list!

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