Your Astonishing Light

astonishing-lightPlease don’t miss this beautiful article written by Brenda Strausz- Read and savor her inspiring words

I wish I could show you when you are lonely or in darkness the astonishing light of your own being. ~Hafiz

As a therapist I observe time after time that almost every client who walks into my office suffers from not loving themselves. They think they are flawed; they think that they are not good looking enough, not funny enough, not smart enough.  They clearly see their shortcomings and overlook their innate beauty and goodness.
I have a small clear glass ball in my office that sits on a brown wooden stand.  I often ask my clients to hold it in their hands as I tell them that this ball can be likened to their essence.  I tell them how they were born as this beautiful ball of glowing energy . . .   they were beautiful babies full of joy and life. They laughed and cried with abandon. They didn’t care what anyone thought of them; they just fully embraced their whole being. They were free and natural and unconstricted. But sadly, this state of being doesn’t last.

All too soon we hear words like, “Don’t touch that. Don’t cry. Be quiet. Sit down. Eat your peas. Go to sleep. Sit up straight. Do it this way. Just be quiet. You’re a geek! You’re stupid. You’re weird.” These words hurt and dis-empower us. Events happen beyond our control: divorce, physical or verbal abuse, illness, loss, school and social pressures. We are convinced that something is very wrong with us. And this beautiful glowing ball of light gets covered with weeds. Consequently, we lose touch with our magnificent essence.
It is vital to our own well-being that we connect once again to this essence. It is vital that we understand that all the old messages that we internalized were really just a story we told ourselves . . . not the truth of who we really are.  
We need to write a new story for ourselves keeping in mind that even though our past impacted us greatly it does not have to be our future. That our parents and others in our lives did the best they could with the resources and understanding they had at the time.  We can view ourselves with love and compassion as we would a treasured friend. And we can begin to visualize a future where we hold ourselves in high regard.
Emotional Freedom Technique uses a setup phrase that always begins with, “Even though I (feel sad or stupid or whatever), I completely love and accept myself”.  The meaning and beauty of this is in realizing that even though you have these problems or struggles, you are still okay.  That the problems in your life are just a small part of you, that there is much more to you than your problems. This realization gives us amazing power and control over our lives.
Author Louise Hay writes in her book about mirror work to reclaim our self- esteem. Looking in the mirror we can really see ourselves.  We can see that we may look sad, and we can look deeply into that sadness.  We can see our fear and look deeply into that fear. And we can be okay with that. We can see that we have been hurt by life but we still have kept going. We can notice the love in our eyes when we think of certain people.  And we can see how hard we have been on ourselves–how hard we have made things for ourselves sometimes.  Maybe we can notice that we need a little love, a little tenderness from the best person who is there to give it–ourselves. And maybe that is the beginning of embracing that beautiful light that has always been and will always be.
So what would it be like if you cared about yourself enough to say, “Life isn’t always easy, but I have never given up”?  What if you realized that you deserve to take really good care of yourself?  What if you finally made time for excitement, delight, creativity or time just to be?  What doors would open?  What would that open space feel like?  And how would the glow coming from you affect the world?

Call to Action:

Look in the mirror and say some of the following phrases or use some of your own.

I am special and wonderful.

I know that I deserve to be happy.

Loving myself unconditionally brings healing and an abundance of love into my life.
Love flows through my body and radiates out from me in all directions.
When I love myself, I not only heal myself, I heal the world.

As you think about your problems, remind yourself that you are not your problems. Draw a house with many windows and in one of the windows write your most pressing problem. This will help you to realize how much more there is to you than your problem.  It is just one window in the house.  What good things do you see in the other windows?

Think about the myths you grew up believing about yourself.  How do you live out those myths?

Get out a journal and write your new empowered story! The story of a most amazing YOU!

Good Reads:

I Had It All the Time by Alan Cohen

The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer

You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay

Brenda Strausz is a holistic psychologist and coach with practice in Southfield, Michigan. She combines alternative and conventional modalities to guide you to live with more ease, joy and freedom. She strongly believes in the power of love and forgiveness. You can contact her at or from her website

You may also like:

Joy is Peace with Wings

The Magic of Love and Acceptance

Lessons in Equanimity

© Copyright 2011  Allison Stuart Kaplan LLC

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  1. Wonderful, enlightening and thought-provoking article. Thank you.

  2. Thank you Joy! I am so glad you liked it!


  3. Good job. I’m definitely going to bookmark you!

  4. Impressive information&great site.

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