Hard to be a mom!

Animal Joy is Bitching on the Blog!

Why is it so hard to be the mom of a 15 year old? I’m talking about my daughter. People would see me with her in the past, interacting with giggles, smiles, jabs, and say “Enjoy it now because it will change!” “No,” I’d say, “Claire is different. She is special. We’re special.” They, all of these people, were right. It has changed. Almost overnight it seems. So, does this mean now that I have to change? I have to stay one step ahead of her so I guess I have to change. I can’t wallow in the “I wish it was yesterday” mode where she’d jump in the car after school full of enthusiasm and smiles, bouncing around telling me all about her day. We’d go get a Starbucks and talk until we got home. Now, she gets in the car I ask her how her day was and I barely get “Fine.” (Okay, that didn’t work so I’ll try another question.) “Who’d you have lunch with?” (Now, she can’t give me a one-word answer.) “Same as usual.” (Oh, so I got three monotone words. Whoopee!) And then the texting begins like I’m a darn limousine driver. No more oral words however few they were. Now I hear click, click, click, buzz, click, etc… And no more Starbucks just “Can we go home? I’m tired.” Ten minutes later she’s up in her room, door closed and I am alone at my kitchen table.

I am so depressed. I miss my daughter. My head knows she has to grow up and find herself, become more independent and make decisions that will not sit well with me, but my heart is breaking. I’m so sad. I don’t want to go through this. What can I do to change my attitude, feel better about all this “instant” change and be a good mom to her?

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  1. Hi Joy,

    I feel your pain as I have a fifteen year old daughter as well. I thought it might be helpful to ask my eighteen year old daughter what she thought of your letter, so I read it to her and I asked her for some insight and she just looked at me and said “hmmmm, did I ever do that!”…………….They dont even realize they are doing it. Its just a phase, it’ll pass, dont be sad!!

  2. Wow, Laura…I never thought of it that way. Thank you so much!

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